Have you seen it yet? Your children becoming like the friends they hang around?
My mom doesn’t have any close girlfriends. Growing up, I never understood that. And she never understood why I’d always ask her to go to a friend’s house to hang out or beg her to have a friend over to play or spend the night. I always knew when I grew up, it was going to be a priority to me to have friends.
So from the time 'Z' was old enough to interact with others, I began teaching him that friendships and relationships are the most precious possession you could ever have. The thing I always told him, and he would repeat back to me, was, “You can never have too many friends.”
Then recently it started happening. He began acting like the friends he was hanging around. Hmmm. Sometimes that was a good thing, sometimes it wasn’t. I was making lunch one day and a Bible verse followed by a God-thought echoed in my head: “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. (Proverbs 27:17)” You become like the friends you hang around. Jean, do you spend enough time with Me to act like Me even when you’re not with Me?
Wow. I realized that I needed to be teaching 'Z' to love everyone but as Proverbs 12:26 says, "The righteous should choose his friends carefully, for the way of the wicked leads them astray."
I also realized I needed to be more intentional about the time I spend with God everyday. If it’s just natural that I’m going to behave like whom I spend time with, then I absolutely want to make sure that I spend time with Jesus frequently. Here are some things that I’m trying to do to make time with Jesus happen:
1. Solving the Problem of Discipline – GO TO BED EARLY OR ON TIME! Set your alarm and get up immediately. Kerri A. taught me several years ago that when 'Z', a chronic early riser, wakes, make a rule that he must stay in his room until 6:30am (or whatever time you choose). If I wake at 6:00, 6:15, or even 6:25, that’s the perfect time for a quiet time. If you have itty bitty ones, carve out your quiet time during their naptime.
2. Solving the Problem of Distractions – Get out of bed, get awake, read and pray aloud.
3. Solving the Problem of Diligence – Leave your Bible or computer open the night before to what you’re going to be reading the next morning. Schedule it on your calendar. Be prepared for Satan’s excuses (too tired, too much to do, etc.). If you miss a day, don’t feel guilty or give up.
4. Solving the Problem of What to Do – Find a devotional Bible or website that matches where you are in life or where you want to be. It could be a Bible reading plan you find online like www.BiblePlan.org, www.BibleGateway.com, or the devotional thought I’m currently reading every day at www.Proverbs31.org. There are many great devotional Bibles out there: Mom’s Devotional Bible is a great one published by MOPS and available at www.MOPS.org.
5. Solving the Problem of How to Pray – I use the “A.C.T.S” model of prayer:
A – Adoration – praising God for who He is, not what He’s done
- C – Confession – if we don’t confess the sin in our life, why should God listen and be moved by our prayer? Feeling like your prayers are going nowhere? Work on confession and watch what happens.
- T – Thanksgiving – thanking God for what He’s done
- S – Supplication – this is the “prayer request” part
Once I got it through my thick head that having a daily quiet time is something that helps me become more like Jesus – an immediate benefit to my family and friends – and that it isn’t something that’s a to-do list item to be checked off, it became easier.
How sharp is your iron? Perhaps taking a little time to cultivate your friendship with Jesus is just what you – and your family – needs.
Written by Jean J.
This was originally published in the MOPS Newsletter in April of 2010.
Used with permission.
